I Know It Might Be Wrong But...

I'M IN LOVE WITH STACEY'S MOM ARNETT


This blog is dedicated to Arnett Edwards, the principal of Li Po Chun United World College of Hong Kong, for granting us Monday off school because of the stress we've been under lately. 


Friday morning was a maths 7:30am type job. Aieee. After that I woke up over brekkie before THE SUBJECT THAT SHALL NOT BE NAMED follwed by free in Geo (aka sunbathing in the courtyard avec Olivia) then physics and English, whereby the usual promise of epic intense social cultural media studies debate was crushed by an hour and a half of mark scheme jargon. Following this muchos let down, I went to Ma On Shan to finally sort out my bank card and send a letter so after queueing in the bank for an hour to deposit some money I was free to return to campus, where it was GO GO GO for the opening ceremony of the Lee Quo Wei hall. Dinner was half an hour early which really messed with everyone's body clock (when I say everyone I'm generalising although I'm pretty sure most people feel the same way I do) and then we all got dressed up and headed for the hall. All the officials and UWC board members got cake and cheese (REAL NOT PLASTIC CHEESE) and other posh yokes and we glared at them from afar (when we weren't too busy taking too many pictures that is).

Mise, Jayla and Paloma

The assembly hall opening was fist swallowing-ly horrendous in parts, and jaw dropping-ly impressive in others. Let's start with the went-according-to-plan stuff, so that we can climax with the funnier anecdotes of the woeful stuff afterwards.



Jaw Droppingly Impressive Moments (2kaii11 lawd)

• Choir 
• Uber talented singers? Check. 
• Lion/Dragon dance
• Judging by the freakishly overenthusiastic UWC board member in front of me, they were a hit
• Ensemble
• In fairness I challenge you to find someone who doesn't like Michael Jackson medleys on classical instruments

Fist Swallowing Moments 

• Hello AV fail. 
• "On behal BZZZZZZ I would like to ta BZZZZZ portunity BZZZ and when thi BZZZZ
• Poor Mr Lee Quo Wei was unfairly forced to turn up, and let's face it, that was probably very detrimental to his health. Madison was informed that he might not make it through the opening. Personally I don't think it's fair to subject someone to going to the opening of an assembly hall if there's a risk that they might die live on the internet?
• Mr Lee and co. fecked off before lion and dragon dance. Awks.

Steve's Face During the AV fail

Somehow after all this opening ceremony fiasco, Olivia managed to convince me to go to Lang Kwai with her, J-Kwok, Carter, Tiffany and Madison. That was fun. We found a monk. 

Fresh as a daisy, 7am sharp the next day I showered, breakfasted, AND packed for coral monitoring in half an hour. Coral was IMMENSE. We took a bus to the lickle port nearby then unpacked all the gear and loaded up the boat. Following this was a blissful hour long boat ride in the sun to the dive site. We were briefed on the general rules for the day -  4 SLICES OF BREAD EACH ONLY.

The diving itself went pretty well. Considering I didn't have my air on at first, I managed pretty well to survive for a while without panicking. I also lost my weight belt in the depths. Ahhh suuuure. When I was kitted up again, all 8 of us dived together. Visibility was about this much I------I. This may have been because we'd all clunk to the bottom, stir up all the sand and flail a lot. After an hour of diving we used up some of our bread, draining the world of its nutella supplies in the process. First exposure to nutella in 2 moths, it does crazy things to ya. Some banterful jumping-off-the-roof-of-the-boat-into-the-sea times were had before another hour of diving, this time I reckon I actually saw some life. As in a real life fish. On the way back, artsy pictures were taken against a sunset and the HK skyline whilst Yara did math IA on a boat like a bawse.

Saturday evening was spent out at the stairs le gach duine but for some crazy reason despite going to bed late enough I was still up mega early on Sunday. Grr. Sunday was spent doing pretty much nothing, cause I was hella tired. I tried some chem homework, got breakfast but  missed brunch (Y I ALWAYS DO THAT?), wrote some letters, did some grocery shopping, prolly had some rehearsals thrown in there too? I had judo that night, I flattened Madison. I shouldn't be proud, she's about half my height.

Monday morning I was supposed to do a geography presentation but I got off the hook cause Mia and Leila took aaaaages. After school I walked into the canteen to see a half crazed Paolina ushering me back out and before I knew it I was on the MTR heading sushi-ward to Ma On Shan. Somehow we managed to make this trip last only 45 minutes cause we had a university meeting at 2:30, although it was an intense scramble back and I ended up cycling a bike with no seat back through campus to the assembly hall with Paolina legging it along behind me. The university talk killed a few people. Shelley (ruthless canadian guidance counseller) stood at the top and told people that you don't need higher math to get into Harvard, that university isn't free, that there is no financial aid here here or here, that Princeton Yale and Harvard are different places, that the people who take music are the ones chosen for med school etc etc. I could go on, but I'm afraid I'd hear the anguished screams and thuds of people whose dreams have been crushed. That afternoon we had coral monitoring service planning which was spent talking about the dive (and planning next weekend's). Then we had China week planning, and we're gonna have some gargantuan task with the mural painting. Bring it? After dinner I had photography which was real good, we got to see everyone's photos with the theme "Off campus" and vote for them. My sunset-boat-subject-mountains picture got 8 votes. Boom. That night we had rehearsals again, it's getting there alright.

Tuesday my chinese class was cancelled so I had a double free block nom nom. Did a bitta math, a bitta chem, a bitta letter writing. After school I went with Liz to MOS to print some photos, send some letters, buy some food, get some caramel bubble tea and do general shtuff like that. That evening rehearsals were cancelled but after check in I watched half a movie with the american boy before organising the largest McDonalds order ever.

Yes, I broke. I have finally joined the McDonalds LPC facebook page. My hungry (yet healthy) nights are now going to be filled with shaky fries and oreo mcflurries. My introduction to this pop culture ritual was intense. The guy was laden down with the orders of 14 different parties, each ordering for others. The bill came to the equivalent of E45.


Wednesday I did me geo presentation which was mega, I blew people's minds with tales of North Korean outward migration. I also had a chemistry lab first class which went splendidly. So splendidly in fact that I decided to do the write up after school, 3 weeks before it was due. So like a bawse, I completed it and it was really really beautifully awesome. Then I accidentally deleted it. No so bawse-like, but eejit-like. Poor Paloma was there to witness mah  creys. It was soul destroying. But I picked myself up by running to the shop in Wu Kai Sha and ingesting impossible quantities of ice-cream, also skyping the rentals.We had rehearsals for the play after check in too which were well good innit.

Thursday I got up nice and earlypants to skype which was quare enjoyable cause afterwards I had a free morning block so I went back to sleep. At breaktime the LPC souvenir shop was open so I bought me a hoody which is real nice on the front (but who really cares if it's class of 2010 on the back anyway). Tar eis na ranganna I had art for non artists. Now AFNA are already the coolest kids on campus but this took it to a whole new level. We painted the sidan chair (there's a sidan chair race this sunday which we have a team for so they needed to spruce up the sidan cahir) by chucking luminous paint on it while dancing to ghetto music. The IDB review team people came round to witness how epic we were and even Shelley came by all like "But you guys I'm always invited to the partayyy!" and we were all like "Boom, we're so awesome that even Shelley wants to go to the AFNA parties". I went to dinner with paint in me hair and after that I went to more play rehearsals instead of the global issues forum which was on split nations (hello Ireland yo) but it was alroish cause rehearsals were real fun. I'd love to elaborate but yanno, top secret and the likes. Thursday after block meeting (someone farted it was lolsome) I started on this yoke and got my chemistry going again. We then got an e-mail saying that we have Monday off school. BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM.


Friday's going grand, I'm was just chilling by the pool during my free block with James, Olivia agus Paolina, throwing down some work and yelling along to Oasis. Jason made a...um...cake of sorts for lachsons birthday so we devoured that a couple of secondos ago. Think a mega pile nutella, melted ice cream, chocolate roll, roulade, hershey's kisses etc etc along with a few teaspoons. I'm thinking of going to a philosophy talk later with Rosie etc later, should be interesting? Esp cause it's in some artsty cafe. 


Look at me, being pretentious. Join me next week for tales of the long weekend! Buh bye guys, 7 weeks and I'm home! x

Jumpsuits and Expatriation

So Saturday was spent lamenting the lack of a scuba dive pretty much. Especially because the sun was splitting the stones and it'd been called off because of the weather. I mooched around campus a bit and went for a swim, all the while giving out to Mia that I couldn't wait for dinner, because dinner means it's nearly time for CAFEEEE


This week's theme was Jungle, so naturally I decided to be a chameleon. In fairness I just wanted an excuse to steal Olivia's Reading jumpsuit, complete with Reading mud still stubbornly embedded. Also, who doesn't want to dance to french songs in a jumpsuit? Cafe went mega well, there were sketches and poems and songs and dances and all variety of things. Also, Laura and Olivia comparing as characters from Avatar was mighty impressive too. I were even nominated for best costume along with Heather as part of the Lord Of The Flies contingent and Peter and Rahael as Chuck Testa and taxidermy respectively. PLUS Imma be bassing it up for the next cafe so watch this space. For the mean time, check out this epic vid-jo of le danse francais (je suis a gauche).

After cafe, we helped clean up and that before heading out to the stairs. Most people got changed but there was no way I was gonna waste any time out of that jumpsuit. For the most part I gave Oda and Madi head massages but then come 11 we all went back to campus for CANTEEN PARTAAAAY. Being the cool people that we are, Olivia and I decided to head to the canteen about half an hour late, where we were met with 0 music and harsh lights. Newbie AV team fail. Canteen party fail. Undeterred, I somehow managed to stay entertained until about 2am whereby I got a little bored of wandering round the various dayrooms and sitting on the pavement outside block 2 DMCing.


The next day I was up bright and ridiculously early, for no apparent reason. I did absolutely NADA other than stay in brunch for longer than necessary (somehow the banoffee pie ain't as nice as it used to be) until around 1 when I decided to be a mad yoke and go to the gym. If you've ever read my previous gym-related blog post you'll probably understand how it went. I'll admit I ended up playing Angry Birds on my iPod whilst on the bike machine. And because the gym was empty I tried (and failed) to destroy the punching bag.


After that I had rehearsals for the play which went pretty well and is improving all the while! Imma get someone to film it when we perform it (less than 3 weeks now) but Imma have to keep it fairly secretive for the time being.


Then I prolly just waited around for dinner, after which I went to the supermarket avec Mia to pick up some brownie mix - we came back with biscuits and jam. Together with Dilene, we spent the next hour and a bit planning our talk on "Expatriation and Culture" for Wednesday's COP day on United World Colleges(Change Of Pace day - instead of classes there are lectures and discussions and workshops etc). Basically, Mia's a bitta China, Argentina, America, Italy, I think there was some Irish and German thrown in there too? And Dilene's Canadian and Rwandan and I'm...Irish and English. Oh joy of joys. I tried to talk myself out of leading a discussion on how expatriation has changed my life (since I crossed the pond all those wha, 14 years ago?!) but they were having none of it. Without me the presentation would lack the only thing I can ever bring to anything - vague self-deprecating humour.


After sorting out all that shizam it was off to bed with me. I'm sure I managed to stay up until midnight doing absolutely nothing though.


Monday classes and a few more classes and a few more classes and maybe bad lunch and then a presentation for China week whereby they claimed that China was a complete raging cesspit. I took it all with a pinch of salt so don't be surprised when I die from eating too much street food. After that came coral monitoring service planning and it turns out we're gonna be having our dive this Saturday instead so happy days. We watched Blue Planet and I got emotional at the part where the food chain happens. Then dinner nomnomnom followed by photography (note to self TAKE PICTURE FOR MONDAY) followed by check in followed by rehearsal. That night I also got my hair cut by Liz. First LPC cut and probably not last if I'm honest! Sustainable living and all that, she did a mighty good job!

Tuesday nowt major happened to the extent of my knowledge but I did my english homework really intensely (discussing teen culture exploitation by the american media INNIT). I also tried to sort out my bank card with Liz in Ma On Shan s never gonna work the first time so I've to summon up the strength to go one stop down the line to try again. I got mango goo juice to console me so it's all good.


WEDNESDAY WAS COP DAY yayayayay! The first alumnus talk I went to was by a student who went to UWC Mahindra. Twas all about her experience there and how at first she hated India but then went back to try and set up a radio station in a small village for a year and all the problems (mostly poo related) that she encountered! The second talk was by Chris Howarth, one of the first to attend Atlantic College UWC in Wales in 1968. He was talking about his life and how being a UWC "global citizen" had really changed his life, and all the incredible experiences he'd had because of it (one of the most graphic being a warehouse orphanage in Romania). He talked all about his United World Schools initiative and claims that from the 10 schools he's got in Cambodia and Sri Lanka at the moment, he plans to expand to 500 schools in the world's most developing countries with the help of his AC peers. Leaving the talk everyone was just like :O BAM motivated for life. I don't mean to sound unnecessarily soppy or nothin' but after that just sitting in the courtyard at bbq lunch le gach duine was really empowering?? After that it was student teacher discussion time, and the first talk I went to was on growing up in the drug wars in Columbia and Mexico. It's really crazy to think that you know people who've experienced things like this but I guess that's what the day was about. For the second and third sessions I was doing my expatriation session with Mia and Dilene and that went purdy darn good if I do say so meself. I got my oppressed-brit-living-in-the-savage-wastelands-of-catholic-ireland stories in and Dilene and Mia got their immense life stories and cultural messed-up ness stories out too, as well as learning from a load of t'others about their experiences. I missed Li Ping's talk on growing up during the cultural revolution but I've heard it was insane. Watching that when it's put up on the network fo sho.


Wednesday night was spent e-mailing and letter writing for the most part, but also revelling in the fact that I'd received a parcel from the fam. Jaffa Cakes were consumed ridiculously fast - turns out that Dutch people have good taste and Chinese/American/Argentinian people not so much. Waste of a Jaffa Cake if you ask me. Wore my new parcel pyjamas to bed and woke up on Thursday nice and late cause I had a free block first class (nomnom).


Thursday was nice, only had three classes, aced me mandarin ab test, had an intense debate in english and actually understood what the fup was going down in physics which is always a pretty rewarding feeling. Lunch was amazing because there are people starting to visit from the other UWC schools so they have to make it look like they feed us well which is nice. That afternoon I completed my geo project (outward migration from North Korea dontcha know), went for a swim with Olivia (no lie we did 2 lengths and somehow stayed in the pool for about 45 minutes), had art for non artists where we drew random stuff on the grass in the courtyard and then did some letter writing in my room whilst Olivia crashed on my bed and we both counted down the seconds to dinner. Which was kind of disappointing because it turned out that all the officials had gone out for dinner. After dinner I was going to go to the Global Issues Forum on split nations (Ireland, Korea and Germany) but that was called off because there were day long dress rehearsals for the opening ceremony of the hall tomorrow night so loads of people couldn't make it. To make up for this cultural loss I hung out in the library, writing this and bookfacing J-Kwok from his vantage point in the assembly hall of boredom. I got another parcel from the fam and the comfort food from that one is pretty much gone already too. Criteria for donations listed below.*


After that I had rehearsals again, and dya know what? It's starting to come together. 17 days to go bitchizz.


Asian love, Hannah x


*Will accept cadbury's, sherbert fountains, dipdabs, angel delight, moros, double deckers, pom bears, rancheros, meanies, yorkies, generally sugary/badforyou foods to the following address: Li Po Chun United World College, 10 Lok Wo Sha Lane, Sai Sha Road, Ma On Shan, Sha Tin, New Territories, Hong Kong.

A Beginner's Guide to Blacking Out in China with a Needle Stuck in Your Bum

Before I get to the subject at hand, I've to babble on about the few days prior to the aforementioned incident, so bear with me.


Friday night was what's subtly known as BOB round these parts. Basically just another opportunity for pictueresque "weheartit.com" type photos (think teenagers, beaches, city scapes, campfires and you're on the right track). I lost my flip flops and had my body invaded by sand during a particularly rough battle of the irish between meself and Aine.


Saturday was scuba diving 10-4 so after a Skype chat with the lawds from ventures who were willing to stay up until almost 3 because they've nothing better to do back at home without me, it was off to the pool. Which was 5 metres away from where I was sitting but sher. After sorting out our weights and buoyancy control devices (that's BCDs if you're in the know) and tanks and fins and masks and snorkels and the like, we quite literally were thrown in the deep end. I only nearly drowned once when Khet's alternative air source decided to go arseways and spit water into my mouth instead. Other than that I was equalising and okay-ing and ascending and neutral buoyanc-ing like a pro.

Tar eis diving I did a bitta homework, and then chilled hung out in the Block 4 dayroom (that's where the party's always at) with Olivia and Jason and Madi and Laura and all the other block 4 dayroom regulars. I made the most delicious banana custard divinity of a dessert of a yoke the world has ever experienced with Olivia. As per usual my improv skills as a chef came in handy when I discovered that I had no milk or sugar. Never fear! I sacrificed the sugar packets I had stolen from Starbucks the week before and smuggled some milk from the canteen under cover of eh, well, grab and run. The custard was mega thick, a bit weird coloured because I'd had to use brown sugar but all aesthetic properties aside it was NOM. We also shared this yellow delight with others so as to improve cultural understanding. A few of us headed off campus to our local potential asbo central and listened to some chooooooons (from my iPod ofc, like dur).


Sunday was inter block swimming competition YAAAAAAAAAAAAAY. Block two (woop woop) but because block three are woeful losers they demanded a rematch (they came second again - waaaaaaaaaaay). This was followed by the bellyflop competition. I was block 2's representative. Leila and I couldn't get enough - PAIN IS TEMPORARY, GLORY IS ETERNAL, innit. The rest of Sunday was spent studying physics and we also had a rehearsal for our top secret play. At 7 Jose gave a Voice talk (like a 20 minute presentation) on bullfighting then after that we had a meeting for cafe followed by a talk from Arnett (an priomhaide).

Monday and school and the likes and had a physics test first class and general school-y type things, had a free block which was nice and then the usual business of Monday post 2:30. We had a session on sleep, so learning how to manage time and setting up roomie agreements and talking about the importance of sleep etc. In the words of J Kwok; "I thought we were coming to live in a city that never sleeps, but really it's just a city that stays up to do math homework!" After that we had coral monitoring service planning, where we basically just discussed what we were gonna get up to on the open water dive at the weekend, and talked about project week, which is where we go to the phillipines or malaysia to go diving for a week. As ya do like. I'm fairly excited. Ar a 5 a chlog we had china week planning. My group is heading to Fuzhou, to paint walls in a children's home. We're going at the end of November and it is gonna be epic. Like srsly, srsly epic. We're going with Ming, me maths teacher and he's fairly funny - our homework was to watch a youtube video on how to paint a wall. After that (see how non stop this is?!) I had dinner (meh) then rushed off to the art room to make posters for cafe, the talent show organising group that I'm part of. However we couldn't get any paper so I DMC-ed as gaeilge le Aine until 7.30 when I had photography! This was graaaand, we'd all had to send in our photos for the "Faces Of LPC" theme, then during the session we critiqued each one without knowing whose was whose then voted for the best. THEN we had check in, to make sure we haven't run away and THEN I had lion dance fitness. Gonna be built like an absolute tank, I'm tellin ya.

Tuesday eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeehhhh literally have no recollection. Dinner was bad though. In this case it’s usually a toasted sandwich type job but on this occasion it was too much to bear so I grabbed me din dins in Wu Kai Sha with Mia and Dilene instead.

Wednesday was the day when I have my first three classes off so that was just divine. I didn’t sleep in though, I had one of me early skype calls, put a wash on, did a bit of homework and study and wrote a couple of letters. Then chemistry and geography followed by a trip to the post office to send aforementioned letters – 3 of em! Aaand then I had another rehearsal for me play in the spiritual room follwed by dance practice organized by Quentin for our performance in café tonight. It’s gonna be fair mental, there are about 25 of us singing in broken French and throwing shapes.

After practice there was a bitta homework to be done and then tutor dinner! So I dunno if I’ve explained tutor groups before but to reiterate it’s a group of about 10 students assigned to a teacher who you can go to in an emergency or if something’s wrong at school etc etc. Kind of like the closest thing to a parent. Every other Wednesday or so (it depends on the tutor) we get together for dinner in our tutor groups, so this week the second years cooked for the firsties. They were an hour late with the food and myself and Shani were desperate enough to run to the canteen and steal some ice-cream beforehand (but don’t tell em that). S’yeah dinner was mega nice, we had meatloaf but halfway through I noticed a rash on my arm, as if I’d been bitten by a mosquito in the same place 15 times. It started to spread and go tobann it was all over my arms. I very casually inquired as to what time the nurse opened at the following morning and Wendy (me tutor) was like *mega suspicious* “….why?” and BAM the rash was revealed and upon further inspection it was all over my arms, back, belly, legs, shnaking up me neck. Wendy was having none of this I’ll sleep on it and get thhe nurse in the morning business so we got a taxi to Sha Tin hospital. After about an hour, I got in to see the doctor. His diagnosis went something like this:

Dr: “So what wrong with you?”

Me: (surprised he hadn’t noticed how unbelievably puffy and red and swollen and itchy I was) “Um. I’ve a rash”

Dr: “Have you eat seafood today, or weird food, or been to strange place you haven’t been before?”

Me: “Um. No.”

Dr: “50% say no! You have urticaria! We inject! And tablets! No need for cream, cream not help!”

So I was ushered into another room where a nurse was gonna inject me so I offered my arm as ya do like and she just pointed to my bum. Oh the mortification but sure I dropped the pants and looked at the curtain. “This make very drowsy ok?” Okay grand, sure I had 6 injections before coming here how bad could this AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

(Hannah blacks out, strangely enough with Band Of Horses’ “Great Salt Lake” playing in my head – for the record, balcking out is epic, it’s like a surge of relaxation and tiredness and nothing)

And next thing I know I’m lying in a bed, and in such a cinematographic way as I open my eyes there are 8 doctors and nurses staring down at me, plugging me into things and shining torches in my eyes, and checking my head for bumps. The only thing I could think of  was that somehow between me thumping to the ground and waking up in bed, my trousers had been pulled up and they’d lifted my monstrous western carcass onto this bed. That was so hideously embarrassing as to leave me laughing like ya wouldn’t believe. The doctor’s diagnosis this time was “Sometimes, body can’t deal with pain, so body shuts down”. Sound.

So after leaving me to rest for what seemed like a century (I was so bored I started playing games with the heart rate monitor by seeing how fast and slow I could go just from lying down – my records were 87 and 45) they finally let me get up and go out to Wendy, who by this stage was as traumatized as the poor nurse who administered that injection. Her side of the story was that I’d gone in to get the routine injection, then mega THUD, then screaming Chinese nurse yelling DOCTOR DOCTOR HELP, then kerfuffle, then hysteric laughter on my behalf about a minute later. She told me some more horror stories about previous tutee’s injuries before we picked up my drowsy-making medicine and got the taxi home, where poor Rahael was convinced that she’d poisoned me with her meatloaf. Me, being me, decided to go along with it and make her feel mega guilty. Muahahaha. I went to find Aine to tell her that I was still alive and that she still had a first year before conking out in bed.

Thursday everything was so impossible to handle because of my drowsy tablets. I could barely keep my eyes open and for my free block I conked out in the common room with Olivia, Ilhelm, Paolina and Guillermo. Naps are commonplace round here! That night I went to the global issues forum on data collection, like how google knows everything about you which was fairly interesting before heading back for some study for mandarin and geo. Gotta love tests!

Friday I had all 5 classes then I sent another letter and (!) received one! Euphoric so I was. I went for a swim which was lurvely cause the sun had come out after a few days of rain, made cookies with Liz, went to music night in block 5 (that’s what we call the principal’s house cause it’s so big it could be its own residential block) whereby I was entertained for the price of feeling as talented as a teaspoon. Friday night I got started on me blog then hung out with Dilene (or Dilaynay if you’re james) on the block 3 roof with candles and music and yoga mats and bourbon creams and dried mango and grapes and crisps (which were all gone by the time Oda and Mia joined us). It started raining so we headed to the academic block and found a deserted sheltered place where myself and Mia stayed until 2am. Not because we had anything deep to share o course, but because we couldn’t be arsed to get up.

Terday I was supposed to go diving for the day but because of the visibility it was called off, so instead I went to lion dance in the morning and am just lazing about until café at 7:30 followed by canteen party (think uncensored pre-teen disco and you’re on the right track).

Talk chis next week, ta ta for now, Hannah x

Takeshi's Castle and Clubbing in China

Once upon a time, there was a little girl called Hannah, who wanted more than anything else in the world to have a 5 day weekend and go to visit Mia in Zhu Hai, China. Here's her tale...

So on rolls the weekend and Hannah's there working like a bawse to get her Chemistry homework done when BAM in comes Liz with plans to go to Mong Kok and stop by the camera shop on the way home. We rounded up some peeps in the form of welsh Paloma, french Quentin and american James (I really don't know why, but nationalities are always necessary nowadays) and set off on the MTR to have ourselves some fun inner city HK times. However, after about 50 minutes of travelling there and emerging into the busy city, Liz finally twigged that the camera shop she wanted was actually way back in Kowloon Tong. So after slagging her for a wee bit we all headed to the mega shopping centre (they're fairly popular in HK I'll tell ya something, Dundrum ain't got nuttin on Mong Kok!) for a bite to eat. This was directly translated into STARBUCKS TIIIIIIME! Now I personally had never experienced Starbucks before and meh, seriously you goys this globalization craic is fairly pricey. But still. I had the routine Starbucks newbie photo taken and I stole some sugar packets for the collection. After losing the boys in the metropolis that is the public toilets we headed on back to campus for....




INDIAN DINNER TIME! A quite substantial group of nearly 30 of us banted on down to Chungking Mansions which is now one of my favourite places in the world (srsly, read that wiki, sure 20% of all mobile phones in Africa have passed through that place). We went up some dodgay dodgay stairs to the Taj Mahal Club (which may or may not double as a human trafficking enterprise) for amazing amazing food of which I ate a lot. Also, mango lassis like no other. After that we met up with other Li Po Chun - ers and walked to see the fireworks as it was the Chinese national day. Now I'm a big fan of fireworks and these were like holyjaysus! I gave up taking crap pictures of them after a few minutes though and just gawped instead.






Dinner @ the Taj Mahal Club

As part of a huge logistical operation by the second years we were shepherded to Lang Kwai on the MTR (Hong Kong's answer to Kilkenny's John Street). Schandal occurred and fun times were had but twas back in bed for 1 because someone (yup, that'd be me) had a boat to catch sa maidin.

*Cue epic adventure music*

Bang on (LPC) time - aka 25 minutes late, 11 enthusiastic adventurers set off to the ferry port led by Norwegian Oda (see, the nationalities thing does kinda add to the story, no?) and laden with bananas. With little hassle other than the offputting fact that the ferry port was over a bridge through a park into a hotel down an escalator through a mall of restaurants and down another escalator, we made it through passport control and onto the ferry, buying an uber tube of malteasers for Mia's younger sisters.

Zhu Hai with Mia was great. It's amazing how different Hong Kong and Mainland are we all went to this place called the underground which was like a shopping centre with about 600 tiny tiny shops it was like some kind of a maze! For we had an argentinian barbeque which was unbelievable. Vegetarians, I just do not understand you sometimes. Nomnom steak and suchlike. As an aside I also think I had about 8 different kinds of cake while I was there. Heads up to Mia's mammy for that one.






Some of the fine goods available in the underground

On the Monday we went to a real life takeshi's castle. I kid you not. Like literally crazy asian assault course over water. Although I don't think I've ever had so many pictures taken of me in my entire life but it's clearly cause my body's too bootilicious. Besides Mia did be speaking the aul mandarin like a bawse at this guy taking photos of us and saying "we're not animals!" but the sight of an argentinian/american speaking chinese was too much so he decided to video instead. We ended up playing volleyball against a group of chinese people which was mega. My skills are unrivalled.






Bikini clad westerners taking on the world, one Chinese province at a time 

Then came the chinese massage. I swear I was being personally victimised by that woman. An hour of pure bone breaking agony. Brit Leila and I were so unbelievably sore. I swear that within a few more minutes my woman would have killed me with her bare hands.




Unaware of the torture that was to come

    We also went "clubbing". Lolololol. This mega club with all the lasers and strobe lights and fog machines and really really loud music and the like and packed full of completely silent unmoving chinese. We were dancing like mad yokes to make the most of our time there cause we reckoned we'd be thrown out for not buying anything. This plan worked exceptionally well cause we ended up being ushered onto the stage so all 14 of us were dancing and singing and going crazy to this unresponsive audience. Yes, there are videos.




Us (and the drunkest of the drunk)

The next morning we headed to the Underground again, bought some pirated totally legit DVDs and came back to chillax in front of said movies before heading home again home again on the ferry. More passport stamps and little physical/emotional strength later we were back in Hong Kong to proceed with our hour long journey home via 4 different MTR lines. Back just in time for dinner (which was, surprise surprise, horrendous).

Conked out that night to wake up 5.15 on the dot, trudge over to the A-block and set myself up for another nice aul skype convo to catch up on the goss from home. That Wednesday was full of hard core study I ain't gonna lie. Chem labs to write up and the likes but I honestly just felt a bit nauseous even typing "chem lab" so praps I should move on from that.

Thursday sure school sure. Had a maths test which went graaaaaaaaand, had a geo quiz which went graaaaaaaaand. Went to Art for Non Artists afterwards which was fun too, I had to draw something representing Jason Kwok. Aka completely insane Jason whose favourite colour is grey. Thursday night is block meeting night, so all the block 2ers hang around in the day room while our head of house (jaysus sounds a bit like hogwarts), Wendy, gives out about how we're unhygienic and the boys bitch about how the other boys can't aim at the toilet seat.

Friday I awoke to a short but sweet e-mail to say that there had been room checks the night before. This means that the teachers go all mission impossible and sneak into our rooms at 3.30am to make sure we're in our rooms. You have no idea how weird it is to think about someone watching you sleep. Let me tell y'all, it's pretty weird. Had school, twas all fine and dandy, I even went to the 7.30 class knowing that our teacher was in the US. My she'd be mighty proud of us all showing up to work like she'd asked. I think we kinda surprised ourselves actually. Gots me a letter in the post which is always insanely nice.Tar eis an scoil I skyped the rentals for a little bit, catching Dad before he went to work and Mum after being rudely awoken by dad as he left for work. Imagine having to get up 45 minutes earlier to skype your own daughter eh? Doesn't bear thinking about! Then by invitation from my bro (american James), I watched Get Him To The Greek with him, Trevor and a slow but steady stream of others before winding up here at 8.30 and wondering where my day has gone.

Got some scuba diving training tomorrow and rehearsals for my uber top secret play on sunday. Bring it.
Until next week, ta ra for now, Hannah x