Vomming Up Chocolate Rabbits

Washed my hands of mocks with the passing of maths paper two (which, thanks to a reclaimed yoga-come-geography room and a shoeless co-year went better than expected) on Wednesday at 10:33am. Roughly. Though having intended to run away to central as soon as permissible, I decided to charge my iPod and wait for free lunch first. 

Then I ran away to Mong Kok, and bought 4 shirts, each more garish than the last, a pair of boots that were slightly too small and made for a petite Italian man but totes fab nonetheless and a skirt or two. Boots aside, all that was about a fiver (yoyos wise). All to that "Mojo presents...Beloved" compilation CD dad got free a few years ago. Got a black and white film (cause I'm really hip) from SimCity, that great 5 story eclectic emporium of camera shops and sex shops. And an egg waffle. Bumming around MK was much overdue, though the humidity is picking up and I got dripped on a fair few times by those mirthless aircons. 

I got back to school fairly early (about 4ish) then went on a friend hunt, sequentially by room of course: Paloma, Lau, Beata, Dilly - until finally I had to settle for Hetzy, comatose on her bed. We made it to Ma On Shan, I had another of those heavenly HK$8 apple pies. And mango sago. Went to the promenade, were mega deep then walked back to school. I picked up a parcel from the general office with seconds to go before uploading the Nigerian CD it contained and devouring the contents (namely a chocolate bunny wabwab) over an erratic putlocker Juno. If you, as I, have not seen it since bebo was still a thing then go watch it. Morgan interrupted halfway through to deal with the realisation that she is becoming slowly more and more bitter. We listened to the soundtrack and moaned together. I lent her the Bart Simpson jumper to cheer her up.

After check in (with 15 minutes of Juno to go) I went to the gym where all of the post-mocks chub second years were de-chubbing with varying success. No lie there were about 15 people in there. Unfortunately after 20 odd minutes of girly cardio, I went to get a glass of water downstairs and vommed up a chocolate wabbit. Pleasant. I decided to call it a day and mooched back to ma chambre, until I decided that I had not quite satisfied my moaning quota for the day and called up Morgan to go whinge some more. Got back to my corner at midnight, and was just settling down for a nice as-many-hours-as-I-wanted kip, when I remembered that I'd only done gone promised Parker that I'd go swimming with him at 6 in the sea. I valiantly set my alarm for 05:45.

Thankfully (?) I had a broken sleep so it was fairly easy to get up. Starfish was less foreboding than last time, and the inky blackness was less so - though the phytoplankton were mysteriously not present. Nothing like a good dose of e.coli before breakfast anyway. Planning to skim the layers of clothing off my floor and get Heather to cut my hair today. 

H

ps. I made a photography blog for my totes trendy piccies. 

pps. I'm going to Thailand on Saturday isn't that odd and worth noting. Mocks have destroyed my ability to contemplate the future. Let's just hope that this time I don't lose the will to live whilst there.

Living the high life: Selfies in bed

I have not posted since September 4th. This does not mean that I have spent 5 months doing nothing of note, but that I have been busy crawling through the thick slime of physics, chemistry and unmentionable acronyms associated with the IB. I'm not exactly through it yet, but because I have mocks in two days and have already tidied my corner, played as much Blokia solitare as one can handle, listened to too much Missy Elliott (which for me is quite impressive, I can go for days on "Work It"), I figured that the only reasonable form of procrastination would be to slink sheepishly back here.

Also Ruth made me guilty with the return of A Healthy Kind Of Vanity and Áine and Verity will be happy.

5 months is a lot of material to prioritise.

My hair was blonde and I went to see Azealia with wondrous bagel-making Apoorva. My hair was ginger for a day and I wore Chris' hat for a day. My hair was brown and I took selfies in bed.

I developed a passion for internet petitions and have saved sharks, Ecuador and Cardiff Riding School.

I went to Taiwan with Maddie for a week, where we moaned about the single life, went for bike rides, drank so much bubble tea that I wouldn't be surprised if there was a helluva lot of bubbles still left in my system, went to the most incredible natural hot springs in the middle of a deserted gorge (save for Zi, whom we had to shake off by pretending to be on our years anniversary holiday), and made friends with the mongolian chain smokers in our strange bedsit excuse for a hostel.

I went travelling for 3 weeks by land across South East Asia from Hong Kong to Kuala Lumpur (and will probably write a whole 'nother post about that) with my fellow raggle taggle gypsies Maddie and Dorte.

I bought embarrassing amounts of hideous clothing and became a sumo wrestler for a night.

I adopted some children and made Dilene's life a living hell.

 I raised my first year to like Hui Lau Shan H1 large and she raised me to better music taste and clothing badassery. (Cue Billy Idol's Dancing With Myself).

I turned 47 18 and now listen to ridiculous amounts of BBC radio 4 and occaisionally go to the gym. This is in accordance with PROJECT HOT ROOM 2/307 and THE COLLARBONES SHOWDOWN JASON V. HANNAH. I went swimming with Bara in Starfish Bay before Trevor's morning block and the only light was from the phytoplankton which made our arms and legs fluorescent blue. That has made my "best Thursday 6am in my whole life ever" slot.

Paula valiantly tried to teach me how to move my hips, but I have found that my talent lies in dragon boating and amateur photoshopping.

James is really hot.

I am sorry for neglecting this little corner of the interwebs for so long, and during these next two weeks of moderately important exams I promise you I will update far too regularly.

h

"What's a typical weekend like?"

Hola.

Coh moh est ass.

Due to popular demand (and a Bosnian fan) I am back. 

I got back to xiang gong on the 19th of Aout. I'd like to say it was an uneventful flight but unfortunately not. After leaving mo dhaidi in the airport and saying my last goodbyes with my stinky ass Pepperami breath I hobbled to my gate aran sweater in tow. I say hobbled, because I had a liquid nitrogen induced blister the size of Jupiter's fourth biggest moon on my left big toe. This did mean that after my flight to Laandaaan I got to hobble to the Passenger Services desk and get a golf buggy with an old kiwi farmer who fit the "can totally walk but gets the buggy for the hell of it" category. I felt so wonderfully obnoxious. It goes slow enough for people to stare longingly at you as you go past which is an added bonus. On the flight I got my foot run over by the food trolley and watched the Lorax and about 10 episodes of New Girl. I were met by a wheelchair after getting off the plane and had a painstaking conversation with the poor woman pushing me because neither of us quite understood the other. 

Despite being saghas neirbhíseach about going back to school, it was crazy normal to be back. Sat eating dinner in the canteen with Jamés, avoiding packing and napping instead with Glenda, doing a tour of public hospitals on my first day back (Prince Of Wales had a 7 hour waiting time for A&E patients and a 4 hour 43 minute waiting time for those with heart attack symptoms) and having Monica and the hospital nurse pin me down and attack my toe to the sounds of an old man die in the corridor. All was as should be.

It didn't really feel like we did much in the way of class, save a physics lab and maybe a chinese e-mail or two. Did my theory of knowledge presentation on the ethical implications of Death Note. Switching down to standard chemistry has made my life full of rainbows and sunshine and love. And free blocks. So many free blocks. Afternoons were spent unpacking and getting my fix of bubble tea and Hui Lau Shan mango sago after a summer of desolation. My curtain rail broke under the weight of all my clothes and fell out of the ceiling. Maintenance have been notified. We went out for buffet Korean BBQ with tutor group one night. I have rarely eaten that much MEAT. I met up with a fellow Kilkennyian at the classiest karaoke bar in HK. Madonna's Like a Prayer was no challenge for my magnificent voice. I cut Jason's hair and gave him a bald patch. I nearly got my lip pierced to boost my street cred for when the first years came. Unforch (or perhaps luckily, it depends on your own view) the piercer was on holidays, so I went back to school, skyped daddy and said hahahahahahalippiercinghahahah to which he was like lol no and then I bitched out. Goodbye street cred but at least Wendy still loves me. I went to Mong Kok with Paloma and bought ugly clothes and sushi. I found a fedora in my room. I've started to get into the Foster the People album. A riveting two weeks I assure you.

And then the first years came.

I like to use the analogy that we are the spiders in the equation. More scared of them than they are of us. The canteen is suddenly mobbed; the cheese goes, the yoghurt goes, my will to live goes. On the Saturday I went diving with coral monitoring - which was nice to escape the madness. I couldn't dive cause of my toe but I did make the most of the nutella sangwitch opportunities. A good crowd of us went to Sai Kung for honeymoon dessert and pizza. Mouthfuls of mango red bean gunk meant that we didn't have to interect much. At about 10pm when I was about to head back, Mia asked if I wanted to do a 2km open water swim race in Repulse Bay cause Dilzy had pulled out. The next morning. At 6am. So I said yeah sure. Having still not properly met my roommates I left at 6am with Mia, got collected by a total stranger, went to Repulse Bay, ate half a packet of digestive cookies and swam 2km as Dilene Mugenzi. Longest race of my life and I nearly crashed into Ocean Park but still got a silver medal. And beat Mia. Was back in school before lunchtime, in an attempt to prove that asking "What's a typical weekend like?" is the most redundant question ever, considering I went with a hideous skirt n' sparkly boob tube-clad Jason to the airport to collect Morgan that afternoon. The people of Ma On Shan are highly judgemental. We played dodgeball on sunday night too. That was one hell of an initiation. Remembering my first week I feel terrible for them - I was the kid too scared to go brush my teeth. So far though they seem unnervingly settled. I'm looking forward to loving them.

Or at least cohabiting.

Future Job Prospects: Mermaid

Post Chem and Physics I feel I can now openly write my blog without feeling the shame of the school and the guilt of myself. Thing is, my brain's spent so long on electromagnetic wave optics and trigonal bipyramidal VSEPR theory that I kinda forget errything that happened in the past week (or so). 

So dinner on Saturday was followed by BLANK. 

On Sunday morning I was supposed to tutor Paco but the thunder and rain was UNRALE so Cherry called it off. Instead I headed off to Kowloon Tong with Mia, Paula and Leila to study geo in Pacific Coffee. They didn't do chai latte (boo hiss) but they didn't really mind us studying so that was great. A few variations of the term "Because poor women have more babies" were thrown around and we felt very intellectual altogether. I shamelessly splashed out on a sketchpad (which I didn't realise was a hipster brand until an obviously jealous Jason pointed it out) and some nice markers in the most lovely bookshop ever - though it was lacking chairs/beanbags. We got back I dunno when, to find that José had lost his "flash-dick" and therefore initiated a mass e-mail war.  I studied a tiny bit for my chem test, doodled in my notebook, went to Pooey's room for a bit and doodled and went to bed.

Monday was 9am chem test. Slightly better than the last though it was hardly a happy skippy fairytale walk in the park moment for me. I studied a bit of Maths and went for a swimble. At 6 I met Áine and le Bobster at the gate and we went to Mammy's house in Sai Kung before heading out avec na páistí agus a fear to Hebe for dinner. I had me a pizza and we talked at length about Denmark. And Irish passports. Got back late enough, did a little more maths and some Chinese.

Tuesday morning I went to tutor Paco and played a substantial amount of hangman with him. The rest of the day were spent with the Kinks and my maths book in the block 1 dayroom, before tutor group (and Simba) milkshakes, burgers and wedges in Wendy's flat. The xbox Kinect was out again, but obvs we're all such hardworking souls that we neglected it in favour of further studying. I did some maths and convinced myself I had it down.

Wednesday, and geo first exam. Threw down some made up (though highly-plausible) case studies about Ireland and all seemed to go well. Gender and development? Sor'ed lawd. Maths paper one then violently assaulted me. I was a little shellshocked after it so lord knows how paper two went. Wednesday evening consisted of more chinese, another nice swim and little else. Think I watched Black Pond that night too, which was the best movie I've seen in yonks. Or maybe it's just Will Sharpe. Obsession du jour, ngl.

Thursday began with unintentionally waking up early. I did a pitiable job on physics then somehow wasted the rest of the day. I did swim though. Oh, and went to tutor Charlie. And discovered that it is Laura who has my pink skirt. I added a load of words to our 中文 class' Memrise list. Jason and Paolina came over and tried on my sequin-adorned clothing and that was about it. 

Friday I got up early, had a shower, got brekkie then headed to Sai Kung on the bus with Palomo. We set up camp in an unbelievably air-conditioned Starbucks (who do do chai lattes, buíochas le dia) and I waded through 2 chapters of physics, exam questions and all. After a quick lunch of a mega Paisano's slice, we got the bus back, I went for a swim and then I had peer support training. From 4:30-6:30 which were fine, if a little tiresome when bang shlap in the middle of study leave. Friday night I was with Jason in the art room then had a DMC with Livvie. Went for a walk with Mia to Ma On Shan. I got fro yo and on our way back along the dark promenade we had to pass through frog breeding zone. We nearly got sexually assaulted and were saved only by the fact that we weren't frogs.

Saturday morning was my meeting with Linder about me english exam. That was fine, just 30 minutes of shite. I went to learn chem with Beata and Khet but soon gave up, instead swimming again because it makes it feel like I've been productive, and then procatinating with Jason in the art room. I'm ashamed to say I watched Mean Girls too, not because of the connotations of the movie (all of which, in my eyes, are positive), but because I did absolutely nooooooooothing. We listened to lots of Crowded House, argued over whose country had the best musical exports and procatinated some more. We also perfected the One Direction "What Makes You Beautiful" parody in retaliation to my supposed friends at home having allowed their minds to become goo under the influence of those five unsavoury boys. 

On Sunday I went over to tutoring for Paco. Didn't get paid which was a little disheartening but I'm hoping she'll realise for next time and I'll be rolling in it. I actually did study all day Sunday, venturing out only for a serious sugar fix. And a swim. And had a long study break in which I skyped ma famille. Did a helluva lotta physics past papers though, wrote my english essay and went to bed. 

Monday morning was another Linda meeting. I bumped into Áine at brekky before handing in my essay so we had a nice half hour dmc. After my meeting was over I put a wash on then knuckled down, doing physics and chemistry (and having some amazing power-naps) until I wound up rolling about on the floor of the block 1 dayroom with Maya and Khet having a "productive" pillow fight - you had to yell a useful chemistry definition before you were allowed to attack. Skyped Megzers too. I was super jeally of her jumper. Before going to bed I got my stuff from the laundry room and therapeutically changed my duvet cover, put away my laundry, matched my socks and created a bag for lost socks all in order to put off the inevitable fact that chemistry and physics were on the next day. I listened to Sana's advice though, and convinced myself that I knew everything. 

This had me sleeping well until 4am when I woke up in agony. Fitfully I stayed in bed until 6:30 when I felt the need to check my facebook. I had a shower, went to breakfast then ran to the nurse's office for the strongest painkillers she had. I downed a couple but was in far too much pain to revise before chem. Chem and physics exams happened, I went to Ma On Shan for celebratory large H1 from the Hui Lau Shan place with Livvie, came back, swam (though I think I only did 4ish lengths, the rest of the time being spent pretending to be a mermaid #noshame), had a pear for dinner cause it was grosspants then returned to meine schlafviertel to write this. English tomorrow but sure that'll be nowt, I'm a native-speaking lang and lit cop out. 中文是另一个故事...

The Lions Of Baskerville

      Monday was just your average Monday purdy much. Wasn't too hard to get out of bed as far as I can remember? After lunch I went looking for a parcel in t'office, which hadn't yet materialised. Then there was an  EE (extended essay) talk on in the geo room which I went to. Thinking of doing my bundle of joy on disparities between gaeilgeoirí and the rest of us plebs. Whether language affects development. Summat to that extent. Following that, I went to the academics office to finally change from chemistry to french b. This plan failed dramatically and I spent the next half hour or so in hysterics. Sure c'est la vie I suppose (oh the irony). Then we had coral monitoring service planning for a little while, got my gear sorted out, th'absolute energy required to squidge into a wetsuit ain't even funny. Mia and I went for self-pity buns in Ma On Shan, but we barely made it that far and just got cha siu fan in le Wu Kai Sha instead. I had photography from 7.30 - 9, felt fairly bad cause I didn't upload a photo because me camera had been outta battery for the most part during CNY. As always there were some pretty impressive ones. After check in was a Chinese Cultural Evening run through, so us lion dancers had to go along from 9.

      Tuesday I had a fairly tiresome full block. Sent 6 postcards after school, and got Mickey Ds with James. Watched The Guard with James & Lee, which went down well enough. James got his fix of Don Cheadle, and I translated. I've been getting a quare bad irish accent off him all week since. Had another CCE run through and probably a lot of lion dance practice, after which I hung out in the Block 1 computer room with Rosie, Laura, Andres and assorted pizza until fairly late.

      Wednesday was IFPCOP (Initiative For Peace Change Of Pace) day. It started at 9 so naturally I chose sleep over brekkie. There were games whereby we basically just had to sabotage the other team in order to save yourself, a guest speaker on genocide, ubes interesting presentations on conflicts (I went to the Colombian one and the Yemeni one), as well as Alisher semi-accidentally continuously spraying vwang in the face with bleach. I say semi-accidentally cause he thought it was water. After school were more EE presentations which I didn't bother going to. Had roughly a million hours of lion dance. Watched the last episode of Sherlock, and read too much damn you auto correct than is necessary, and left me sniggering helplessly.

      Thursday I had another morning free so naturellement it was sleep>brekkie. Bought lion dance shoes in Ma On Shan with Dilene, finished my ep of sherlock, ate a lot of peachy chewing gum, had an aeon more lion dance, went to art for non artists and wrote positive messages for all those poor dying secondies. There was another run through for CCE and I spent ages and ages trying to extract the 2nd sherlock ep (The Hounds Of Baskerville one) from the supposedly "blank" dvd.


      Friday was graaaand, had a mid-day free in which Dilaynay somehow ended up making us listen to country music and Paolina got dodgy videos, had lion dance straight after school, followed by a nommyful lunch (for once) in the canteen. Chilled in my room with me itunes, FINALLY got the Sherlock episode off the DVD, then had lion dance from 7 - 12:30. Twas unreal. Got pretty sick and lost me voice towards the end but still had a good Friday night with James, Lee, Apopo and Rahael. 


      Saturday morning I woke up surprisingly early, and went to Arnett's UWC values day seminar discussion blue sky thing. We all split into groups and discussed how we can make UWCLPC more in line with the UWC values. I were in a group with Nawnee, Maddie, teachers Beta & Sandy, a parent and two alumni, one Korean/German and another Venezuelan/German, both teachers in HK. We were the environment group adn had a pretty productive session. After that I had a good bit of lion dance whereby we changed the whole layout of the routine the day of the show. Clever clever. When lion dance was over I chillaxed like god knows what for as long as possible. CCE dinner was at 6 so I got ready with Rahael & Celine. While most went for azzuluthely gawjuzz qipaos, we decided to buck the trend and go as accidental chinese hipsters. It was a little worrying to find that most of the inspiration came from my regular clothes. Hmm. After an 8 course dinner, served by our very own Ella Chan, I set up camp on the 1st floor of the courtyard ready for the show. Twas a grand affair and any slight mishap (dragon decapitation for example) was dealt with jolly tremendously innit. After fan dance was my moment to shine (perhaps sparkle is more appropriate) along with all 10 other first year lions. You've heard me bang on about this for long enough, tis about time y'all saw a video or at least some evidence that I actually did something. After CCE was over there were too many photos so I ran for the hills/confines of my bedroom. I played Tetris like a poorly loser ought to until Lee and Tomi came round and got me off me arse. We recruited Rahael too, and Rahael and I took advantage of the free food and drinks in the canteen party before having our own little party just the 4 of us which was fair noice too. We went back into the canteen party at 12 but I walked in, saw my 12 year old self and went back to play Tetris. Read some of my Brian Cox book and had a luffly sleep with the leccy blanky up high. 

AALLL the lion dancers!

I'm the butt of the silver one closest...

      Sunday I woke up all leisurely like, took a shower, studied geography with Mia & Leila in block 3 before heading to Mong Kok with Mia where she went off for lunch with her dad in TST and I got me mammy her birthday present. Took some photos for photography tomorrow, just missed out on an epic shot of a sheepish boy peeing into a bin. I came back, practiced me bass, ate a mars bar and did me laundry. Might be playing scrabble with the brits later and I've also got judo at 7.30. Should also really tidy my room...

I Know It Might Be Wrong But...

I'M IN LOVE WITH STACEY'S MOM ARNETT


This blog is dedicated to Arnett Edwards, the principal of Li Po Chun United World College of Hong Kong, for granting us Monday off school because of the stress we've been under lately. 


Friday morning was a maths 7:30am type job. Aieee. After that I woke up over brekkie before THE SUBJECT THAT SHALL NOT BE NAMED follwed by free in Geo (aka sunbathing in the courtyard avec Olivia) then physics and English, whereby the usual promise of epic intense social cultural media studies debate was crushed by an hour and a half of mark scheme jargon. Following this muchos let down, I went to Ma On Shan to finally sort out my bank card and send a letter so after queueing in the bank for an hour to deposit some money I was free to return to campus, where it was GO GO GO for the opening ceremony of the Lee Quo Wei hall. Dinner was half an hour early which really messed with everyone's body clock (when I say everyone I'm generalising although I'm pretty sure most people feel the same way I do) and then we all got dressed up and headed for the hall. All the officials and UWC board members got cake and cheese (REAL NOT PLASTIC CHEESE) and other posh yokes and we glared at them from afar (when we weren't too busy taking too many pictures that is).

Mise, Jayla and Paloma

The assembly hall opening was fist swallowing-ly horrendous in parts, and jaw dropping-ly impressive in others. Let's start with the went-according-to-plan stuff, so that we can climax with the funnier anecdotes of the woeful stuff afterwards.



Jaw Droppingly Impressive Moments (2kaii11 lawd)

• Choir 
• Uber talented singers? Check. 
• Lion/Dragon dance
• Judging by the freakishly overenthusiastic UWC board member in front of me, they were a hit
• Ensemble
• In fairness I challenge you to find someone who doesn't like Michael Jackson medleys on classical instruments

Fist Swallowing Moments 

• Hello AV fail. 
• "On behal BZZZZZZ I would like to ta BZZZZZ portunity BZZZ and when thi BZZZZ
• Poor Mr Lee Quo Wei was unfairly forced to turn up, and let's face it, that was probably very detrimental to his health. Madison was informed that he might not make it through the opening. Personally I don't think it's fair to subject someone to going to the opening of an assembly hall if there's a risk that they might die live on the internet?
• Mr Lee and co. fecked off before lion and dragon dance. Awks.

Steve's Face During the AV fail

Somehow after all this opening ceremony fiasco, Olivia managed to convince me to go to Lang Kwai with her, J-Kwok, Carter, Tiffany and Madison. That was fun. We found a monk. 

Fresh as a daisy, 7am sharp the next day I showered, breakfasted, AND packed for coral monitoring in half an hour. Coral was IMMENSE. We took a bus to the lickle port nearby then unpacked all the gear and loaded up the boat. Following this was a blissful hour long boat ride in the sun to the dive site. We were briefed on the general rules for the day -  4 SLICES OF BREAD EACH ONLY.

The diving itself went pretty well. Considering I didn't have my air on at first, I managed pretty well to survive for a while without panicking. I also lost my weight belt in the depths. Ahhh suuuure. When I was kitted up again, all 8 of us dived together. Visibility was about this much I------I. This may have been because we'd all clunk to the bottom, stir up all the sand and flail a lot. After an hour of diving we used up some of our bread, draining the world of its nutella supplies in the process. First exposure to nutella in 2 moths, it does crazy things to ya. Some banterful jumping-off-the-roof-of-the-boat-into-the-sea times were had before another hour of diving, this time I reckon I actually saw some life. As in a real life fish. On the way back, artsy pictures were taken against a sunset and the HK skyline whilst Yara did math IA on a boat like a bawse.

Saturday evening was spent out at the stairs le gach duine but for some crazy reason despite going to bed late enough I was still up mega early on Sunday. Grr. Sunday was spent doing pretty much nothing, cause I was hella tired. I tried some chem homework, got breakfast but  missed brunch (Y I ALWAYS DO THAT?), wrote some letters, did some grocery shopping, prolly had some rehearsals thrown in there too? I had judo that night, I flattened Madison. I shouldn't be proud, she's about half my height.

Monday morning I was supposed to do a geography presentation but I got off the hook cause Mia and Leila took aaaaages. After school I walked into the canteen to see a half crazed Paolina ushering me back out and before I knew it I was on the MTR heading sushi-ward to Ma On Shan. Somehow we managed to make this trip last only 45 minutes cause we had a university meeting at 2:30, although it was an intense scramble back and I ended up cycling a bike with no seat back through campus to the assembly hall with Paolina legging it along behind me. The university talk killed a few people. Shelley (ruthless canadian guidance counseller) stood at the top and told people that you don't need higher math to get into Harvard, that university isn't free, that there is no financial aid here here or here, that Princeton Yale and Harvard are different places, that the people who take music are the ones chosen for med school etc etc. I could go on, but I'm afraid I'd hear the anguished screams and thuds of people whose dreams have been crushed. That afternoon we had coral monitoring service planning which was spent talking about the dive (and planning next weekend's). Then we had China week planning, and we're gonna have some gargantuan task with the mural painting. Bring it? After dinner I had photography which was real good, we got to see everyone's photos with the theme "Off campus" and vote for them. My sunset-boat-subject-mountains picture got 8 votes. Boom. That night we had rehearsals again, it's getting there alright.

Tuesday my chinese class was cancelled so I had a double free block nom nom. Did a bitta math, a bitta chem, a bitta letter writing. After school I went with Liz to MOS to print some photos, send some letters, buy some food, get some caramel bubble tea and do general shtuff like that. That evening rehearsals were cancelled but after check in I watched half a movie with the american boy before organising the largest McDonalds order ever.

Yes, I broke. I have finally joined the McDonalds LPC facebook page. My hungry (yet healthy) nights are now going to be filled with shaky fries and oreo mcflurries. My introduction to this pop culture ritual was intense. The guy was laden down with the orders of 14 different parties, each ordering for others. The bill came to the equivalent of E45.


Wednesday I did me geo presentation which was mega, I blew people's minds with tales of North Korean outward migration. I also had a chemistry lab first class which went splendidly. So splendidly in fact that I decided to do the write up after school, 3 weeks before it was due. So like a bawse, I completed it and it was really really beautifully awesome. Then I accidentally deleted it. No so bawse-like, but eejit-like. Poor Paloma was there to witness mah  creys. It was soul destroying. But I picked myself up by running to the shop in Wu Kai Sha and ingesting impossible quantities of ice-cream, also skyping the rentals.We had rehearsals for the play after check in too which were well good innit.

Thursday I got up nice and earlypants to skype which was quare enjoyable cause afterwards I had a free morning block so I went back to sleep. At breaktime the LPC souvenir shop was open so I bought me a hoody which is real nice on the front (but who really cares if it's class of 2010 on the back anyway). Tar eis na ranganna I had art for non artists. Now AFNA are already the coolest kids on campus but this took it to a whole new level. We painted the sidan chair (there's a sidan chair race this sunday which we have a team for so they needed to spruce up the sidan cahir) by chucking luminous paint on it while dancing to ghetto music. The IDB review team people came round to witness how epic we were and even Shelley came by all like "But you guys I'm always invited to the partayyy!" and we were all like "Boom, we're so awesome that even Shelley wants to go to the AFNA parties". I went to dinner with paint in me hair and after that I went to more play rehearsals instead of the global issues forum which was on split nations (hello Ireland yo) but it was alroish cause rehearsals were real fun. I'd love to elaborate but yanno, top secret and the likes. Thursday after block meeting (someone farted it was lolsome) I started on this yoke and got my chemistry going again. We then got an e-mail saying that we have Monday off school. BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM.


Friday's going grand, I'm was just chilling by the pool during my free block with James, Olivia agus Paolina, throwing down some work and yelling along to Oasis. Jason made a...um...cake of sorts for lachsons birthday so we devoured that a couple of secondos ago. Think a mega pile nutella, melted ice cream, chocolate roll, roulade, hershey's kisses etc etc along with a few teaspoons. I'm thinking of going to a philosophy talk later with Rosie etc later, should be interesting? Esp cause it's in some artsty cafe. 


Look at me, being pretentious. Join me next week for tales of the long weekend! Buh bye guys, 7 weeks and I'm home! x

Jumpsuits and Expatriation

So Saturday was spent lamenting the lack of a scuba dive pretty much. Especially because the sun was splitting the stones and it'd been called off because of the weather. I mooched around campus a bit and went for a swim, all the while giving out to Mia that I couldn't wait for dinner, because dinner means it's nearly time for CAFEEEE


This week's theme was Jungle, so naturally I decided to be a chameleon. In fairness I just wanted an excuse to steal Olivia's Reading jumpsuit, complete with Reading mud still stubbornly embedded. Also, who doesn't want to dance to french songs in a jumpsuit? Cafe went mega well, there were sketches and poems and songs and dances and all variety of things. Also, Laura and Olivia comparing as characters from Avatar was mighty impressive too. I were even nominated for best costume along with Heather as part of the Lord Of The Flies contingent and Peter and Rahael as Chuck Testa and taxidermy respectively. PLUS Imma be bassing it up for the next cafe so watch this space. For the mean time, check out this epic vid-jo of le danse francais (je suis a gauche).

After cafe, we helped clean up and that before heading out to the stairs. Most people got changed but there was no way I was gonna waste any time out of that jumpsuit. For the most part I gave Oda and Madi head massages but then come 11 we all went back to campus for CANTEEN PARTAAAAY. Being the cool people that we are, Olivia and I decided to head to the canteen about half an hour late, where we were met with 0 music and harsh lights. Newbie AV team fail. Canteen party fail. Undeterred, I somehow managed to stay entertained until about 2am whereby I got a little bored of wandering round the various dayrooms and sitting on the pavement outside block 2 DMCing.


The next day I was up bright and ridiculously early, for no apparent reason. I did absolutely NADA other than stay in brunch for longer than necessary (somehow the banoffee pie ain't as nice as it used to be) until around 1 when I decided to be a mad yoke and go to the gym. If you've ever read my previous gym-related blog post you'll probably understand how it went. I'll admit I ended up playing Angry Birds on my iPod whilst on the bike machine. And because the gym was empty I tried (and failed) to destroy the punching bag.


After that I had rehearsals for the play which went pretty well and is improving all the while! Imma get someone to film it when we perform it (less than 3 weeks now) but Imma have to keep it fairly secretive for the time being.


Then I prolly just waited around for dinner, after which I went to the supermarket avec Mia to pick up some brownie mix - we came back with biscuits and jam. Together with Dilene, we spent the next hour and a bit planning our talk on "Expatriation and Culture" for Wednesday's COP day on United World Colleges(Change Of Pace day - instead of classes there are lectures and discussions and workshops etc). Basically, Mia's a bitta China, Argentina, America, Italy, I think there was some Irish and German thrown in there too? And Dilene's Canadian and Rwandan and I'm...Irish and English. Oh joy of joys. I tried to talk myself out of leading a discussion on how expatriation has changed my life (since I crossed the pond all those wha, 14 years ago?!) but they were having none of it. Without me the presentation would lack the only thing I can ever bring to anything - vague self-deprecating humour.


After sorting out all that shizam it was off to bed with me. I'm sure I managed to stay up until midnight doing absolutely nothing though.


Monday classes and a few more classes and a few more classes and maybe bad lunch and then a presentation for China week whereby they claimed that China was a complete raging cesspit. I took it all with a pinch of salt so don't be surprised when I die from eating too much street food. After that came coral monitoring service planning and it turns out we're gonna be having our dive this Saturday instead so happy days. We watched Blue Planet and I got emotional at the part where the food chain happens. Then dinner nomnomnom followed by photography (note to self TAKE PICTURE FOR MONDAY) followed by check in followed by rehearsal. That night I also got my hair cut by Liz. First LPC cut and probably not last if I'm honest! Sustainable living and all that, she did a mighty good job!

Tuesday nowt major happened to the extent of my knowledge but I did my english homework really intensely (discussing teen culture exploitation by the american media INNIT). I also tried to sort out my bank card with Liz in Ma On Shan s never gonna work the first time so I've to summon up the strength to go one stop down the line to try again. I got mango goo juice to console me so it's all good.


WEDNESDAY WAS COP DAY yayayayay! The first alumnus talk I went to was by a student who went to UWC Mahindra. Twas all about her experience there and how at first she hated India but then went back to try and set up a radio station in a small village for a year and all the problems (mostly poo related) that she encountered! The second talk was by Chris Howarth, one of the first to attend Atlantic College UWC in Wales in 1968. He was talking about his life and how being a UWC "global citizen" had really changed his life, and all the incredible experiences he'd had because of it (one of the most graphic being a warehouse orphanage in Romania). He talked all about his United World Schools initiative and claims that from the 10 schools he's got in Cambodia and Sri Lanka at the moment, he plans to expand to 500 schools in the world's most developing countries with the help of his AC peers. Leaving the talk everyone was just like :O BAM motivated for life. I don't mean to sound unnecessarily soppy or nothin' but after that just sitting in the courtyard at bbq lunch le gach duine was really empowering?? After that it was student teacher discussion time, and the first talk I went to was on growing up in the drug wars in Columbia and Mexico. It's really crazy to think that you know people who've experienced things like this but I guess that's what the day was about. For the second and third sessions I was doing my expatriation session with Mia and Dilene and that went purdy darn good if I do say so meself. I got my oppressed-brit-living-in-the-savage-wastelands-of-catholic-ireland stories in and Dilene and Mia got their immense life stories and cultural messed-up ness stories out too, as well as learning from a load of t'others about their experiences. I missed Li Ping's talk on growing up during the cultural revolution but I've heard it was insane. Watching that when it's put up on the network fo sho.


Wednesday night was spent e-mailing and letter writing for the most part, but also revelling in the fact that I'd received a parcel from the fam. Jaffa Cakes were consumed ridiculously fast - turns out that Dutch people have good taste and Chinese/American/Argentinian people not so much. Waste of a Jaffa Cake if you ask me. Wore my new parcel pyjamas to bed and woke up on Thursday nice and late cause I had a free block first class (nomnom).


Thursday was nice, only had three classes, aced me mandarin ab test, had an intense debate in english and actually understood what the fup was going down in physics which is always a pretty rewarding feeling. Lunch was amazing because there are people starting to visit from the other UWC schools so they have to make it look like they feed us well which is nice. That afternoon I completed my geo project (outward migration from North Korea dontcha know), went for a swim with Olivia (no lie we did 2 lengths and somehow stayed in the pool for about 45 minutes), had art for non artists where we drew random stuff on the grass in the courtyard and then did some letter writing in my room whilst Olivia crashed on my bed and we both counted down the seconds to dinner. Which was kind of disappointing because it turned out that all the officials had gone out for dinner. After dinner I was going to go to the Global Issues Forum on split nations (Ireland, Korea and Germany) but that was called off because there were day long dress rehearsals for the opening ceremony of the hall tomorrow night so loads of people couldn't make it. To make up for this cultural loss I hung out in the library, writing this and bookfacing J-Kwok from his vantage point in the assembly hall of boredom. I got another parcel from the fam and the comfort food from that one is pretty much gone already too. Criteria for donations listed below.*


After that I had rehearsals again, and dya know what? It's starting to come together. 17 days to go bitchizz.


Asian love, Hannah x


*Will accept cadbury's, sherbert fountains, dipdabs, angel delight, moros, double deckers, pom bears, rancheros, meanies, yorkies, generally sugary/badforyou foods to the following address: Li Po Chun United World College, 10 Lok Wo Sha Lane, Sai Sha Road, Ma On Shan, Sha Tin, New Territories, Hong Kong.

(Dis)Orientation Week

I have just established that my blog is back working. I'm feckin elated. Those of you who had to experience my distraught ranting will know that blogger failed me on numerous occasions (and also that I was too much of a total twat to save a copy of my literary wonders). Those of you who narrowly avoided this rage, know that you are very, very lucky.

Now as expressed in blog the first, this blog was to keep y'all updated with tales from An tSín. Well táim anseo anois I guess, so brace yerselves!

I'm now nearing the end of week two. Week one was (dis)Orientation Week. Direct quote from first night's journal entry: "Too scared to go brush my teeth". There were alcohol awareness sessions (discussing alcohol in relation to cultural background - the words "I'm from Ireland" were enough to send the whole room into fits of laughter), camping (boat to hostel, complete with alternative dance/play, bbq pits, 4 hour hike, mega mega bugs such as praying mantis of doom, paggle-ing* in the sea, plenty of mozzy bites), pool games (think psycho competitive Hannah playing water polo whilst acquiring impressive burn tan lines and braving wearing a bikini despite high percentage of gorgeous long limbed latinos), infamous morning briefings (whereby I slept), and thai fishcakes (the canteen's shnakey way of fooling us into thinking the food would be daycent).

I don't think I got to bed before 2!

To round it all off, we had ICE (International Cultural Evening - this place is FULL of abbreviations; NACE, ECE, IB, LPC, UWC, CCE, QC, MESA...). This was fairly epic. For *ahem* the irish national dress *ahem* I wore my huuuuurlin socks (with sandals ofc), shamrock shaped sunglasses (ta very much Euro2), green soccer shorts, CELTIC WARRIORS IRELAND shirt boom agus super super dodge rara skirt from the Flea market (ex students leave their stuff eg curtains and first years go mental and buy things such as super dodge rara skirts and cube shaped hello kitty stools...). S'yeah bhí gach duine in their costumes and after dinner we all headed to the courtyard where the second years put on a fairly epic show. Highlight? Brit (plus Aine ofc) contingent's rendition of the Spice Girls. Either that or hip hop lion dance.

This week has been a lot more chill. Classes started, sure it's all going grand wha? With the exception of chemistry, but I've a nice system where Olivia (fellow confused peep) and I run to the common room during our free blocks and cry/do our chemistry homework le chéile. Chinese Ab Initio would be the funniest thing to sit in on. 24 foreigners yelling MA MA MA MA (with perfect tonal pronunciation might I add).

Tuesday was a day off cause of some national holiday so on Monday night a few of us went out for dinner. We went to a mega fishy district, i've never seen so many fish tanks in my entire LIFE crammed with like mega creepy types of fish.

...so naturally we went to an Indian. I got uber spicy potato curry to fit in with my stereotype (irish people only eat spuds, period).

Then for pierside walk watching all them floating lanterns followed by block two roof DMC avec Liz (dutch).

Your nationality becomes your name most of the time! I'm no longer Hannah, I'm Hannah-from-Ireland. More often than not I'm Ireland-from-Hannah though.


My living quarters are summat like this. I've a quarter of a room all to meself, with bed, desk, wardrobe, shelves, drawers. It has since been covered in Ikea produce. I'm practically scandinavian. I'm sure Swedish citizenship is based on your expenditure per annum in Ikea. 

I'll prolly be posting once a week from now on, but me e-mail is hannahmae27@hotmail.com and my addy is

Hannah Read
Room 204
Block 2
Li Po Chun United World College
10 Lok Wo Sha Lane
Sai Sha Road
Ma On Shan
Sha Tin
New Territories
Hong Kong

for those of you who still appreciate the beauty of snail mail.

Apologies for using words such as "super" and "chill". Please beat it out of me over Christmas.



Love to Éire, Hannah x

Me drinking bubble tea. More photos

*intentional misspelling